The Blair Witch Project – (Contains Spoilers)

Blair Witch ProjectIt was hyped as the be all and end all of horror films; I remember my mind being set against The Blair Witch Project even before seeing it.  I’m all for innovation in film but the concept of the film, as was hyped, already had me on edge – even before the jerky camera work and ham acting.

I guess in a way, the film didn’t disappoint me; but only because it did, in actual fact, disappoint me so much. There are times I like to be proven correct in my assumptions and this is one instance where I could say with satisfaction:

I knew this film would suck!

The biggest problem I had with the film were the young paranormal investigators. Granted, they were never billed as professional paranormal investigators but still, even Micah did some research in Paranormal Activity (albeit poorly executed research).

Instead of choosing to research their target and equip themselves, these hapless buffoons set out on a camping trip with a camera and some tents. Then – surprise, surprise – when they pique the interest of whatever malevolent entity is out there (we never really find out what it is), they get pWn3d.

Worse than that, our intrepid autodarwinates actually exhibit zero common sense. I might choose to ridicule their lack of paranormal awareness and preparedness; and I can appreciate that some people may think:

Come on Armaitus, everyone knows that this ghosts and goblins malarkey is all stuff and nonsense.

But even the most die hard skeptic should be able to see that the films protagonists have a combined IQ of 12. In my head, Ray Mears cries himself to sleep because people like these exist. When lost in the woods (woods that you have studied for some time I might add) and you come across a river – you follow it out. You don’t run around, allowing some half baked forest witch cloud your inner sense of direction with corn dollies.

The one positive I took away from the film was the way the entity was portrayed. The entity acted exactly as I would expect a malevolent entity, that has just had a group of intellectually challenged come barging through their territory and poking around, to act. The use of mimicry to lure them out of their camp, the hidden body parts of their missing comrade and especially the way it turned them around on their forest walk (something I’ve actually experienced in the past).